vulnerability

A challenging chapter in my book, named vulnerability. One im not sure I
completely understand but something essential to grasp hold of as
a Christian and a woman. When I think of the word vulnerable, I think pretty
much opening myself 100 percent to any kind of situation, vulnerability to me
is like taking a risk whethere it be for love or a specific circumstance. I think
what Jesus defines as vulnerabilitty or has intended for it to mean is a little
different. Granted, it can mean something different to each person.

What I feel Jesus speaks to me is being able and willing to voluntarily
place myself in a situation, for the sake of a much larger purpose than I can
comprehend, that could bring pain. Paula rhinehart says it so well. You are
willing to risk your heart in a vulnerable way. Wow.

I don't know about you but when I hear the words risk my heart....and pain
in the same sentence, it kinda scares me. I've spent years risking my heart
and it ending in pain.

But I believe God means something far greater than pain. Vulnerability
comes hand in hand with strength. How do I be a strong woman with a soft heart?
what do I really deel about a specific situation? What do I think?
where do I really sense God in the situation at all?

We find our strength in Christ Jesus and without trusting him, we won't
be able to be vulnerable to the things he has called us to on a daily
basis. The kind of strength God wants to shape in me is so much different
than the kind of strength society displays for us. There is no human model
I know of that displays strength through Christ which I think shows us
even more our daily need of Jesus and laying our life down every morning
as if nothing had yet been done. We must look to God himself!

I've always been one of those women that feels like everyone else comes first
and ill take my number and wait in the back and whatever is left over, its mine.

God says no no no, you got this all wrong. He really teaching me to focus
on what really matters and the rest will fall into place. I find when I would
think like the woman who takes the number and stands in the back, we
completely miss out on what God is saying to us, I don't want to miss out
that's for sure. I want a soul I can walk around in and I know God
helping develop that.

There are so many angles to the vulnerability I believe God has called us to.
To walk in his light, to open our heart and soul to others so that we may have
REAL relationships in his body. To know we need Jesus and to one day look at our
hearts and know that we didn't stand still but our hearts matured and had depth
and meaning.

And after all that, we must still honor our hearts. This spoke to me so deeply;
"The strength of vulnerability is the fire of a tender heart that forges steel
in the soul. As difficult as it is to live with a vulnerable heart, it is far
easier than camping out behind a facade. Jesus is the lamb who conquers all.
He says, come to me, all who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give
you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am GENTLE and
HUMBLE in heart; and you SHALL find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy
and my load is light."

My soul finds rest in you Jesus.